Not since Orton & Edge vs. HBK & HHH at New Year’s Revolution has a match fallen apart like last night’s IC Title Elimination Chamber.

So King Barrett throws Dolph Ziggler into Mark Henry’s UNBREAKABLE PEXIGLASS THAT THEY USE IN ARMOURED VEHICLES MAGGLE causing it to fall off, leaving Henry to stand there with his thumb up his arse before deciding to join the match as JBL asks out loud if this is legal before getting shouted at via headset.

It became obvious Henry had jumped his cue as the match fell apart so badly that Ziggler had to resort to shouting orders at everyone like Sgt. Hartman to get something resembling a match together.

Oh and then Sheamus’ door stuck. This was all this match needed, because it was a planned spot that managed to look like a fuck-up because everybody was doing very convincing impressions of people who had no idea what was going on. It looked like Sheamus blocked the lock with his necklace to get the advantage (which makes sense, let everyone kill each other and then get what’s left) but when he pulled the necklace out, all we got from the commentators said was JBL going ”Oh he fixed it!”

Not even they knew what was happening. Or maybe Sheamus saw what was happening outside and went ”er my door doesn’t work. Aye that’s it.”

I feel bad putting Dolph’s spot-calling in Botchamania because at least somebody was trying to fix the match. Unlike Mark Henry who stood there watching Barrett & Ziggler wrestle right in front of him and broke up a pin-fall attempt in an elimination match just because he was looking for something to do.

Oh and R-Truth pinned King Barrett.

It’s the current favourite for Most Botched Match Of The Year and God help us if anything beats it.

  • Exy

    I remember the Bryan and Vinny review from 2011 or 2010 or so, where Vinny remarked that the glass can resist space but not Wade Barrett and that the manufacturers must be very ashamed that the commentators were talking it up so much given how it was being used in the match.

  • pootietang

    Please put it in botchamania in detail. I couldn’t hear what they were saying and it didn’t seem overly botched to me, but I’m sure you were paying closer attention. At first I couldn’t tell if Henry getting out was even a botch (I started leaning that way when he was just standing around watching though)

  • Lie Maid

    I think the only thing in this match that wasn’t botched was the result, as Ryback winning was the right call. Of course this was the opposite of the main event which was amazing except for pissing everyone off with a hackneyed Dusty Finish. At least Owens/Cena was excellent.

    • overpoweredginger

      I actually liked the Dusty finish. It let Ambrose be directly relevant for a while, but it’ll let Creative pull him out of Bork Lesnar’s path without putting Rollins over him. Think about it this way: would you rather have Seth or Dean steamrolled by Lesnar upon his return?

      • Muchawlucha

        Both. No one should escape Lesnar.

  • Rusty Shackleford

    The whole sheamus locking the pod spot would have been better done if they had just left Mark’s pod in the rotation and given sheamus an extra 4 minutes having Mark’s busted pod chosen.

  • I bet last night’s RAW and Elimination Chamber was so bad that we’re probably given 2 episodes of Botchamania.

  • JD

    It reminds me of the Money in the Bank ladder match which Cena won (forget the year), the end was botched as the briefcase broke from the clasp but Cena made that botch work, he kept hitting Show’s head with the case and looked shocked and happy to have won it. Mark could have made this work, he could have told Barrett to bullhammer him back into the cage with a distraction from Ziggler or gone in, worked some guys telling them to wing it then eat a finisher and lay down till his spots were up…..NOT FUCKING STAND STILL AND BUTT IN ON OTHER SPOTS.

  • Beige Lunatics

    After putting the company’s top heel (at the time) on the shelf, “winning” the IC belt seems like a suitable punishment for the Ryback. Your move, Jack Swagger.

  • Randall Stevens

    i’d be okay with r-truth pinning barrett if this was leading to a push for r-truth of some kind. but obviously it’s not.

    • Hunter

      His push is what they call in the business a “slow burn”

  • gabbylsk

    Is it worth noting that Barrett’s current KOTR gimmick makes him look like just another cosplayer at a Comic Con? Even Ken Jeong looked better in Role Models.

  • Hunter

    I think the most glaring weakness in the IC title match was Rybacks timing, the crowd was hot for what he was doing, but that whole finishing segment was at times too slow or too fast (like when he went for shell-shocked there was 0 drama) They should have left Truth, Ziggler and Barret in the match once things went south, and let Ryback clear them out in quick succession for the win. Also, I think the crowd deflated when they got Henry as the replacement. I understand you need a guy in there and the surprise needent overshadow anything else they had planned for the event but give us someone people will actually pop for or at least someone who could hold the match together. I anticipate they felt like Henry was the most veteran option so I guess we should just be glad it wasnt Kane or Big Show which would a killed the whole thing anyways,

  • I couldn’t tell if the Sheamus thing was legit or if they were just stalling for time since Mark got out early. In fairness to him, he didn’t seem sure whether he was allowed in or not and seemed to be checking with the ref, who ultimately gave him the go-ahead (big mistake, clearly).

    But hey, the glass didn’t break, just as promised! They simply should have used something stronger than Elmer’s to fix it in place, that’s all.

  • DrLetzShake

    barrett is getting buried so nonstop youd think he was running an opposing wrestling company while working for wwe
    they keep coming up with reasons to keep him on tv just to job him out.
    put the ic title on him so he can lose to midcarders on RAW/SD just so he can survive a title match on a ppv preshow
    then he drops the ic title so they give him king of the ring just to keep him on tv so he can continue to job out to rtruth and the like

  • Andrew Thomas Wolf

    damn, Sheamus is such a bore…. ever since he came back we have gotten less Luke Harper, and that is not a good thing

  • Gruntt

    What was the point of making Barret KOTR if he’s going to lose matches? I was expecting him to become IC champion. I guess Ryback is ok, but his problem is that Ryback’s rivalries are so slow and boring, it’s better off sticking the title on Ziggler, or some new person on the roster and job them out.

    • Catherine Bouey

      The ic title deserves someone better than Ziggler……or another Curtis Axel winning the the title with no buildup and essentially being A place holder.

      • Gruntt

        Axel, that poor sap.

  • CamShark

    Thank You! I’m surprised it took this long to hear someone explain that the door was jammed on purpose by his necklace. Why it was played off as Sheamus “using it to open the door” is beyond me.

  • Lionel

    Where is the video? I don’t see it!

  • MisterForth

    After the Hartman reference, I want an ending where the match audio is replaced. Anyone that has editing skills would be my new friend.

    • Muchawlucha

      Didn’t you watch the Botchamania featuring this match? It had the voice clip where Ermey kept shouting at the bald guy from “The Cell” while he had difficulty climbing the obstacles.

      Come to think of it it’s a shame WWE missed out on a chance to use Sgt Slaughter’s legit military background to create a stable based on Full Metal Jacket.

    • Muchawlucha

      Didn’t you watch the Botchamania featuring this match? It had the voice clip where Ermey kept shouting at the bald guy from “The Cell” while he had difficulty climbing the obstacles.

      Come to think of it it’s a shame WWE missed out on a chance to use Sgt Slaughter’s legit military background to create a stable based on Full Metal Jacket.

  • Well, if you can explain that, can you find someone to explain this:

    • Muchawlucha

      I… I have a plethora of ethnic/religious jokes involving Muhammad Hassan for this but I can’t say them here.

  • Kaylyn Owens

    I will forever think Ziggler should’ve won that match. Not just because he was the only guy that remembered what was supposed to be going on, but also because he could’ve easily lied to his clueless opponents and handed himself the title.

    • Butchwhacker

      That would have been a better finish for sure.