Ah, the Most Botched Matches Of The Year list. 2014’s edition got some flack for featuring matches that were bad because of the crowd reactions than because of the match itself, so it’s all shite matches (and video game music) this time around. Getting this under fifteen minutes was a bitch, so there was no time for a DISHONOURABLE MENTIONS bit so feel free to list your alternatives.


Das List…

10. Tag Team Elimination Match (WWE Elimination Chamber 2015)

9. Genichiro Tenryu vs. Kazuchika Okada (Tenryu Project Retirement Final)

8. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Myzteziz (AAA Triplemania XXIII)

7. Battle Hive vs. Wrecking Crew (Chikara For British Eyes Only)

6. Lucha Dragons vs. New Day vs. Prime Time Players vs. Los Matadores (WWE Summerslam)

5. Nick Gage vs. Chris Dickinson (Beyond Wrestling When Satan Rules His World)

4. Wyatt Family vs. Dudleys, Rhino & Tommy Dreamer (WWE TLC)

3. Nikki Bella vs. Charlotte (WWE Hell In A Cell)

2. Akebono vs. Jun Akiyama (AJPW Royal Road Tournament 2015 Final)

1. IC Elimination Chamber (WWE Elimination Chamber)


Notes…

Los Villanos vs. Los Psycho Circus from AAA TripleMania XXIII got a -***** rating from Dave Meltzer, but a match has to actually feature wrestling to have botches in it. Hence The Worst Match Ever not appearing on this list.


Sin Cara I and II are both in this list. I don’t know what happened to Sin Cara II this year but he really did just start cosplaying as his clone twin. The gimmick is cursed like The Monkey’s Paw.


I wasn’t going to include Tenryu’s last match until it was voted Match of The Year in Japan.


A match between Gage and Dickinson was always going to be scrappy, so I felt like mentioning how good the match was to balance it being on this list. After all, I don’t want to see a fucking Figure Four Leg Lock from these two.


The members of The Wrecking Crew would like me to remind whoever is reading this that they were all incredibly jet-lagged and so we should be a bit more considerate. Aye.


NJPW is on everybody’s lips at the minute and then you watch AJPW and see Akebono winning tournaments when he looks like he should be headlining a morgue.


Number One shouldn’t be a shock for anyone who’s seen it. Everything that could go wrong went wrong, the commentators didn’t know what was happening, Mark Henry looked lost rather than a grizzled vet….yeah. You can tell me numbers two to ten were wrong but nothing’s going to change my views on this ‘un.


Music…

Wookie Hole by David Wise (Battletoads)

Stage Theme 2 by Hirohiko Takayama, Tsukamoto (Lemmings, Mega Drive)

Rocket Rider (Ch 3 Dark World) by dB soundworks (Super Meat Boy)

Fight 2 by Nobuo Uematsu (Final Fantasy IV)

Level 1 That Old Army Gameby Patrick Collins, Andy Blythe, Marten Joustra and Allister Brimble (Toy Story, Mega Drive)

The Vital Vitriol (Plague Knight Battle) by Jake Kaufman (Shovel Knight)

Hydrocity Zone 2 by Howard Drossin (Sonic 3)

Italy by Jeroen Tel (OutRun Europa, C64)

Empire – The Final Assault Kazuo Hanzawa (Gunstar Heroes)

  • You botched the name of Akebono’s opponent.

  • Saleh Nassar

    As I was watching #2 I couldn’t help to think: “dude, what happened to RVD and Tajiri?”.

  • Христо Георгиев
  • Христо Георгиев
  • Христо Георгиев
  • Христо Георгиев
  • Gruntt

    Being someone who watched the Rey vs Myz match, I can say it was botchy.
    Rey’s entance attire was badass though.

  • K.

    I love so much how Bryan and Ziggler are like “Oh, sure, it was the best match of all times ! Fucking Taker-HBK or Macho-Steamboat level” and Ryback don’t have a clue “Well… There was some problems, like…”

  • MPT

    Los Villanos vs. Los Psycho Circus was truly number one. Making the save in a Tag Team Elimination Chamber match makes sense because it prolongs the match and tires out your opponents to the extent that you’ll easily win. What does tope mean? Dolph was right

    • MaffewOfBotchamania

      ”Dolph was right”
      Never change.

      • MPT

        “Never change”
        Thanks for the kind words

  • Justin The Pepsiman

    Number 1 was the worst, but if Ziggler didn’t step up to try to save the match, the whole list could have been just that match

  • ACLupo

    That was Shuji Ishikawa taking on Akebono, not Jun Akiyama (Akiyama won the tournament final against Akebono, this was a semi-final match before it). Ishikawa’s so legendary that he doesn’t even have his own wikipedia page. But according to cagematch, he’s a powerhouse deathmatch wrestler with a judo background who has worked primarily for Big Japan and DDT for the last 13 years. Apparently he’s a good Deathmatch wrestler, but a terrible Akebono opponent.

    • Horgh

      I’ve seen Ishikawa live. He’s decent enough, but ‘Bono is just riding on his sumo fame. Ishikawa just isn’t the kind of lightweight bump machine Akebono needs to look good.

    • MaffewOfBotchamania

      This is my mistake. I used cagematch.de to check Akebono’s last opponent and didn’t even check if it was him.

      I don’t know puro that well, but even I know Akiyama isn’t Ishikawa. But I’m shit sometimes.

  • Matthew Murphy

    Sincara for Botchamania HoF.

  • fdsaf

    Credit to Ziggler for actually knowing how to work and getting people’s shit together. Anybody who’s worked more than a decade like Henry should have been able to easily just call it in the ring. Fuck, all you have to do is know your major spots and who’s eliminating who. Everything else can (and should be) on the fly. I can’t count the number of times I was in matches were shit went to hell (like the ring floor breaking…in multiple places). That was 15 years ago, though. I don’t know what the kids do these days.