NXT Takeover – San Antonio

On the 28th of January, the talented men and women of NXT invaded San Antonio, Texas.

If you’ve somehow been living under a rock, NXT is kind of like the little sister to WWE’s Big Brother. It’s younger, smller and probably into vaping and dapping. But let’s not hold those crimes against it — it’s time for a Takeover!

Fate has conspired against my writing about this fine show any sooner than now. Since then, we have had three or four more weeks of exciting NXT action to watch via the WWE Network. So I’m going to keep this fairly brief as we catch up.

Takeover San Antonio began super strong with Tye Dylinger vs Eric Young. They had an energetic and hard-hitting match, exactly the kind of thing that I personally love.

Not pictured: Robots and androids in the audience all enthusiastically shouting out “TWO!”

TEN vs TNA. Or something. I’ll be honest, this wasn’t a match that I was really expecting a lot from. Was I ever wrong.

Dylinger brought his ‘A’ game, at one point sending his veteran adversary over the top rope, Young crashing down hard to the floor outside. I really thought Tye was going to win and that Eric was just here to make him look good.

Well, he did that. Both guys looked good alright. But, to the shock of many, Eric The Red won.

Tidy little match!

Next up, the former Ring Of Honourer Roderick Strong took on the newly vicious Andrade “Cien” Almas.

You can tell that Almas has turned to the dark side because he’s started wearing black bin liners / trash bags as trousers. Plus, Almas’s knees have fists have on them. Fists! COULD THIS BE A SECRET ALLIANCE WITH THE REVIVAL? STAY TUNED TO NITRO TO FIND OUT!

Ah, I miss Tony Schiavone. He did his best with what they gave him.

Anyway, Strong won. Decent but unremarkable.

Now it’s time for #DIY (Johnny Gargano & Tomasso Ciampa) to defend their NXT tag titles!

They face the Authors Of Pain!

Who, tonight, come out wearing spooky Stormtrooper Helmets. Maybe, since Fred Ottman has been in the news recently due to serious illness, it’s in homage to the Shockmaster? Or maybe it’s a tribute to Vader, for similar reasons? Or, perhaps it’s all just a concidence. Dave Meltzer, I assume you’re reading this. Can you let me know in the comments? Thanks.

It’s great to see the veteran mischief maker Paul Ellering in the corner of the AOP. Do you know who I’m talking about? If you don’t, hey! If you haven’t already then you should go find the Last Battle Of Atlanta. on the WWE Network.

Among his various achievements, Ellering used to manage the Road Warriors (or if you prefer, the Legion Of Doom), who went on to be the ONLY team in history to be the tag champions in not only the WWE (WWF), but also the NWA and the AWA!

Did you know? They brought us neon Zubaz! Well, supposedly anyway. It’s hard to track what’s real and what isn’t sometimes.

He also used to manage these guys, who at the time of writing are either investors in TNA or part owners or a subsidiary of them or something like that.

Did you know? They were neo Nazis! Well, supposedly, anyway. It’s hard to track what’s real and what isn’t sometimes.

Anyway. Great camera-work all night. Exemplified by a great close-up shot of Tomasso’s knee colliding with one of the Authors Of Pain (either Akon or the RZA, I’m not sure which).

But in the end, the Authors Of Pain got the win, fair demolishing their indie veteran opponents.

The Mets fan is happy, and that’s what counts. Two thumbs up here too.

I was delighted, but not everyone was. Check out the two hippies on the right. They’re all, “Boo, these guys aren’t real authors! We have a boutique e-publishing firm, so we know what we’re talking about”.

We have new NXT tag champions!

But have the Authors Of Pain truly closed the book on Hashtag D.I.Y.? Or, have they merely turned the page? Stay tuned to NXT, for the next chapter etc.

Uncanny Valley Stone Cold Steve Austin invites you to download the new WWE fruit machine! I’ve seen some surprised that the WWE are involving themselves with gambling, given their viewing audience tends to skew younger.

Seth Rollins turns up and calls out HHH. HHH comes out. He has no time for his former protege however. Tr’aitch sics some goons — hired goons — on Seth, who beats them all up. More minions are dispatched and eventually Seth is restrained and escorted backstage.

I hope he doesn’t get fired or anything like that. Sad to see a promising future potentially ended, here, with charges of illegal trespass. What were you thinking Seth?

Next up is the NXT women’s title four-way match. NXT Women’s champion Asuka defend against Sanity’s Nikki Cross, as well as both Peyton RoyceBillie Kay.

A friend of my wife kindly took the notes for me for this one, while I was busy with a disobedient puppy.

“2 skinny Aussie broads stick Nikki Cross through a table.” Yes they did, it was a fine spot towards the end of what I recall being a pretty decent match.

“Nikki Cross = Hacksaw Jim Duggan.” (?)

“Asuka wins! Yay!” Yay indeed! This was another excellent match featuring Asuka who in this house can basically do no wrong.

The witches howl in delight and pull out their hair as the Elder Gods descend upon the prone body of their sacrifice. CTHULHU FHTAGN!

Lastly, it was time for the main event, which saw NXT champion Shinsuke Nakamura defend against Bobby Roode

The challenger Roode comes out first, escorted by 8 Ladies.

Shinsuke Nakamura comes out, escorted by those Japanese battling seizure robots.

“ARGH!” says Bobby Roode. It is captioned. Tremendous.

“Get in mah belly!” shouts Shinsuke. DID YOU KNOW? Japanese wrestlers *love* impressions of Mike Myers.

Nakamura’s leg is targeted by Roode throughout the match, building to where Nakaura is left figuratively without a leg to stand on. Or maybe I mean literally, because he does really not have a leg on which he can stand. Or maybe I was right the first time, because he only figuratively is without the leg. Help me, C.M. Punk!

Roode wins.

Just look at that picture. Look at that face. It might be 30 years late, but Ted Dibiase finally has a singles title in the WWE. At last!

We have a new NXT champion!

Overall, I enjoyed this the most of any NXT show I have seen since the wonderful Takeover Dallas of last year. You know, more than anything else, I came out of this show really eager to see what’s going to happen next on NXT. I love how there’s a steadily growing roster of different wrestlers, men and women, young and old, human and robots. There’s now such a great mix of indie veterans and big green promising prospects.

We’re excited to see what’s next for NXT. Hey, we have Wrestlemania weekend coming up! Anything can happen.

One thing struck me. You know, I don’t recall seeing or hearing one of the offical NXT themes, as provided by N.F. Maybe I just missed him? Maybe they wanted someone internationally renowned, and he is only nationally known in the good ol’ U.S. Or maybe he wasn’t a big enough star. Maybe his game was all just front.

Hey, thanks for reading this and sorry for the delay. Until next time, remember …

Neon Zubaz > Neo Nazis. You’ve got to have a system.


Eric Young defeated Tye Dillinger (10:55)

Roderick Strong defeated Andrade “Cien” Almas (11:40)

The Authors Of Pain defeated #DIY (14:30)

Asuka defeated Peyton Royce, Billie Kay and Nikki Cross (9:55)

Bobby Roode defeated Shinsuke Nakamura (27:15)