WWE Smackdown


Live, 1st August 2017!


The new WWE United States Champion A.J. Styles makes his way to the ring. He is swiftly joined by Kevin Owens.


K.O. is still visibly smarting over losing his title last week to A.J. His rematch is… right now!


Fast exciting match, in and outside the ring.


Man, Kevin Owens is such a great talker and English isn’t even his first language. Sure, I could point to say, Cesaro as another good example, but… Kevin is such a natural shit-talker, on a whole other level.


K.O. collides with the ref, sending the ref crashing down and clutching his face. K.O. is distracted – and that’s all it takes to give A.J. the break he needs to pick up the pin-fall victory!


Imagine if K.O. and Lo Ki formed a team named after themselves. Would that be kooky?

But I’m not sure that Owens had both of his shoulders down, and neither are the commentators! Sweet poetic justice for Owens’ tainted win at WWE Battleground.




Backstage, Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon talk to the ref about the bad call. The ref is receiving medical attention.


Kevin turns up to yell. There’s going to be a rematch between Kevin and Styles at Summerslam! Great stuff!


Shane is made the referee for the Summerslam rematch between Owens and AJ. Oh. Good. It had been eating me up, the way that the Shane vs. AJ feud had just stopped, after Wrestlemania. Thank goodness it looks like it may continue. That’s a relief.




Whilst I am still busy thanking my lucky stars, we get a recap of the feud between Usos and The New Day.


Usos pretend to be New Day, getting on the mic and letting the fans think they are The New Day.


They then stroll to the ring and give a Dadaist promo. You’ll have to watch it yourself, I can’t do the full thing justice here.


“BIFF POW! … … (comic books).”


Oh, that “BIFF POW!” Thanks, Use. That may be the first time that “biff pow” has required disambiguation.




It’s time for this week’s installment of Fashion Peaks!


Um. I can’t do this justice I really can’t. Just look at the screenshot!


The Ascension appear, to the confusion of our handsome heroes. They have already discounted The Ascension as the culprits, multiple times now.


What kind of syrup do you pour on a log? Maple, of course!

“No more metaphors!”, cries out Tyler Breeze. He and Fandango are essential viewing every time they come on my T.V. and this week was no different!




Sami Zayn comes out. He doesn’t have a jacket or a cap on! MY BOY! Yes!


Aidan English comes out with scarf, opera and pretensiousness. They get into it. Before I can type, “I hope Sami wins”, Aidan wins with a roll-up!


Aidan English is gasping in shock. That’s a gasp – don’t confuse this with a namaste, they’re exclusive to the RAW brand.

Sami and Aidan are both shocked. So is our lounge. Except for the cat, to be fair.


Mike and Maria Kannellis both come out to gloat.


Great, now I’m going to have their theme song stuck in my head for the next 6 hours, at least.




My husband gets very excited to see that one of Jinder Mahal‘s t-shirts has an elephant on it. He wants the shirt now. Sometimes it’s as simple as that.


Becky Lynch makes her way out! Tonight, she teams with Smackdown women’s champion Naomi, against Natalya and Carmella.


Decent match, Naomi in particular is a real workhorse out there tonight! She picks up the win by making Carmella tap. Carmella is looking better in the ring all the time, every time I see her she seems that little more assured.


And these two ladies can simply do no wrong, in this house! Unless they suddenly turned up and refused to take their shoes off, or something.



Backstage, Renee Young interviews Jinder w/ the Singh Brothers


Jinder Mahal talks about the Xenaphobia everywhere, and that’s about it.


Aww, don’t hate Xena. Look, she’s just reaching for that brass ring, just like any of us.



Rusev comes out to the entrance ramp with an almighty pounce!


His opponent in the ring tonight is to be… Chad Gable.


Hard hitting match! Gable tosses Rusev around, including a scary German suplex.


Gable flips off the top turnbuckle and away from Rusev, which all leads to a great moonsault from Chad.


Happily this is all reminding me of watching an old WCW match between Brian Pillman and the man they call Vader. Which is exactly what I want. For whatever reason, this is the match I have enjoyed watching the most, so far this week.


Jason Jordan may have Kurt Angle’s genes, but Chad Gable has his exciting move-set. Chad busts out Kurt Angle’s angle lock, or as it is immediately renamed here, the Uncle Lock.


Uncle Lock! See, Chad Gable is brothers in American Alpha with Jason Jordan, whose Dad is Kurt Angle, who is most associated with the move. Uncle Lock! $$$!!! ¢¢¢!!!

Rusev finally turns the tables and picks up the victory, applying his Accolade hold on Gable.


He brags about being unbeatable and wanting a Summerslam match.


Rusev’s music starts to play, which causes Rusev to seem a little scared, for some reason?


Oh! And then, Randy Orton‘s music hits. Arf.


Randy accepts Rusev’s ‘challenge’. Rusev speaks Bulgarian in response.


R.K.O.! Looks like these two will be getting it on at Summerfest!




John Cena is out for our main event, to determine Jinder Mahal’s next PPV opponent.


Then next out is Shinsuke Nakamura, tonight cosplaying as a Liquorice Allsort.


Meanwhile, Jinder Mahal watches the match from a sky-box, with the Singh Brothers.


“Jinder Mahal there, getting a ringside view!” – Vince McMahon

Back and forth, each men trading submission holds. First the fujiwara armbar from Nakamura, then an STF from Cena.


Exciting stuff! Although it suffers from Epic T.V. Match Syndrome, where both guys start to act like they’re in an Ironman match by about the 5 minute mark.


Especially sweet spot where Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment, before rolling straight through into another one.


This second A.A. is blocked by Shinsuke who – OWCH! – hits a reverse suplex on John Cena which looks to have seriously hurt Cena’s neck!


Shinsuke wins! He will face Jinder Mahal at Summerslam, for the WWE Championship.


After the bell… it looks to me like Shinsuke mouths, “I’m sorry”, and Cena replies with something like, “It’s okay”.


Oh, maaaaaaan!




Another entertaining episode of Smackdown! Too close to call which show we both enjoyed the more out of this and WWE Raw this week. So just watch them both, eh?


Highlight:


Chad Gable v. Rusev – just really worked for me as a T.V. match, like I said before. I hope I get to see these two pairing up again soon!


Lowlight:


Shinsuke Nakamura and his scary botch onto John Cena’s surgically repaired neck. First Bayley, now Cena… At this rate, Summerslam is going to be performed by James Ellsworth and your Granny on bongos!

  • Bushwhacker Puuuke

    > Imagine if K.O. and Lo Ki formed a team named after their surnames. Would that be kooky?

    Oh, the K.O / Lo Ki? Oh, the K.O. / Lo Ki! Knees bend, arms stretch, rah rah rah.