The collected Tweets from last night’s three-hour long car crash.
- ”Everybody download an app with your iPhone” Fuck off, I’m poor.
- MOST SHOCKING MOMENT SLAMMY 2012: Abraham Washington’s Kobe moment.
- And the Slammy goes to a BOOGEYMAN RUN-IN
- New Age Outlaws present the COMEBACK OF THE YEAR. Which means Dogg isn’t winning it
- -Footage of a man suffering a heart attack and nearly dying to get reactions/ratings- YUP, IT’S WRESTLING
- Jerry Lawler wins, which isn’t fair. Billy Gunn’s died way more times on TV than he has.
- HEY KIDS, REMEMBER THE ATTITUDE ERA IT WAS AWESOME apart from albert ignore that shut up.
- So does everybody America have a Smartphone or something? My phone has Snake on it and the Battletoads pause theme for a ring-tone.
- THE AJ AWARD FOR BEING AJ is next. Tune in after the break to see who wins!
- AJ The Carpenter’s Dream: Flat as a board and easy to screw.
- Ziggler x AJ just happened. Ziggler took a back-bump from AJ’s tonsils.
- Lord ZigglerHeart: ”She’s got a tongue like an electric eel, and she likes the taste of a man’s tonsils!” #WOOF
- ”Lets give Khali credit, he’s a former World Champion” Michael Cole after three minutes of laughing at Khali.
- When I used to live with people who didn’t like wrestling, they’d ask me to tell them when he was on TNA so they could watch.
- John Cena wins the Slammy for Superstar of the Year. CASH IT IN ZIGGLER, CASH IT IN.
- Shane Douglas just got kicked out of the audience again if he was in attendance. -timexiled
- Hey look, two guys that got divorced in 2012. Fun year -thehistoryofwwe
- CM Punk has never been more justified.
- Instant Anti-Drug PSA: screenshot CM Punk next to Ric Flair.
- One-legged CM Punk takes on Ric Flair. Which one’s the broomstick?
- That Rolox line wasn’t a mistake – it’s all he can get his hands on these days -necrobucther187
- Camera catches a I JUST MIZZED MY PANTS sign next to The Shield.
- Flair’s reaction to seeing The Shield: “what I do this time, officers?”. -thrill
- Looks slightly silly having all three members of The Shield looking to take out Flair…and Flair’s all SMILING AND PROFILING
- John Cena Superstar of the Year and a big Flair fan…stays in the back while Flair is triple-teamed.
- The Shield vs. Team AJ booked for the Rumble. Shield adds a dozen more members to even the field.
- Seth Rollins realised it was Christmas so he decided to Die Hard.
- After the Mayan Apocalypse, Ron Simmons will be there to say ”Damn” to a cameraman only he can see.
- Lord Tensai attempts to shrug off being reminded of his previous gimmicks by turning into The Shockmaster.
- WWE obviously wants to cash in that lucrative Botchamania market.
- They show Orton humiliating Ricardo a day after he turns face. I’m getting mixed-signals.
- You know you’re watching the longest running sports entertainment episodic show when the adverts are longer than the matches.
- Looks like Flair’s last divorce got his hair – Bundy
- Rock wins award. He’s not here. WWE!
- Production fucks up, right after Albert falls on his face. Sin Cara is in vicinity. Shit, he’s contagious!
- Jerry Lawler: I’ve seen better hair in a shower drain!
- Cody wins with the AMMA REVERSE DDT MYSELF move.
- HERE COMES RYDER…and there goes his pop. Uh-Oh.
- I hope this Smartphone guy debuts at Rumble, WWE is pushing the hell out of him.
- I’m watching Raw to find out who wins an award for tweeting. Nathan Barley was right.
- Remember every time you vote for Jericho, Hogan gets five more votes.
- Big Show’s giant chair gives La Parka an erection.
- Ryder didn’t win the Twitter award and didn’t get a pop. But people tell me Ryder is really popular…
- I hope Big Show Chair’s theme music is American Made.
- I love Show on the mic, he can make even the most tedious insults sound soul-destroying.
- …Ziggler tried to cash in MITB but Cena attacked him so nothing happened. This show in a nut-shell.
- Now I get why this show moves so fast despite being three hours long..if they let you pause for thought you’ll realise SHIT DON’T MAKE SENSE
- FLAIR’S WRESTLING! No he isn’t. THE ROCK WINS! He’s not here. ZIGGLER’S CASHING IN! Sorry, no.
- This show’s been such a cock-tease so far that AJ is getting envious.
- MEANWHILE IN THE BACK AFTER THE BREAK WHILE THE WRESTLERS WAIT IN THE RING. PRESUMABLY CHECKING THEIR SMARTPHONES.
- Tommy Dreamer is as tanned as Alberto Del Rio.
- Calm down CZW, the crowd is chanting ECW.
- Nice to see those months of losing to legends has lead Heath Slater to…losing to legends.
- Jerry Lawler: ”I was in a band called T-Mobile but we kept on breaking up.”
- ”Hard camera!” someone in the ring as Jinder Mahal turns his rest-hold around to face the cameramen.
- The Three Guys They Don’t Know What To Do With take on The Two Guys They Don’t Know What To Do With + Guest
- ”When Andy Murray wins they call him British but when he loses they call him Scottish” JBL gets us.
- They’re plugging a commercial-free SmackDown tomorrow night. If it’s anything like this show it’ll only be 10 minutes long.
- I hope Brodus gets sad backstage again when he doesn’t win this Slammy.
- The back of Dreamer’s t-shirt says “no politics, no bs, just wrestling”, which I find hysterical to see on WWE television – victoria
- cesaro is the only actual newcomer.
- ”You can’t argue with this guys!” WATCH US COLE
- Watching Ryback quote Owen Hart was like watching that Husky that can say ”I Love You” on YouTube.
- I’d have loved to have seen this match built up on PPV and delivered properly.
- MEEEEEEAN WOOOOO BY GAAAAAWD GEEEEEEEENE
- It’s 2012 and Mean Gene has finally aged.
- Real Talk: Lesnar vs. Cena is my MOTY. Watching that with a room-full of people was insane.
- THIS BUSINESS Slammy 2012 goes to Triple H.
- I wonder how HHH feels about being the X-Pac of the HBK/Undertaker/HHH clique.
- THIS BUSINESS count: 2
- Gotta love Ricardo being fearless against gangs. He’s so used to being beat up by ADR he doesn’t care.
- i hope sheamus comes out and pushes her off
- Kevin Bacon doing the ‘Six degrees of Kevin Bacon’ thing. At her current rate, we’ll soon be able to play ‘Two degrees of AJ’.
- 3 Hour Raws are like those supermarket Deluxe Pizzas: Seem like a really good idea but when you finish it you never want to do it again.
- So is Vickie a face now? There’s been so many inexplicable turns tonight you’d think George Michael was driving again.
- Tommy Dreamer comes out from the back, grabs Vickie & AJ and shouts ”I’LL TAKE ‘EM BOTH…I’M HARDCORE”
- I HAVE NO IDEA WHO I’M SUPPOSED TO BE CHEERING FOR
- AJ goes to the back and brings back…some guy!
- LITERALLY NO IDEA WHO THAT IS
- Everyone on Twitter is telling me the individual’s name is ”Ryblack.”
- I’m guessing Generic Big Black Guy Whose Gimmick Is Being Big came free with The Shield’s Generic Heel Jim Johnston Theme?
- People are saying ”Dude, it’s Big E. from NXT! Don’t you watch NXT?” FUCKING NO.
- Vince McMahon’s secret emergency plans when ratings drop: 1. Turn AJ 2. Big Black Guy 3. Humiliate J.R. 4. Fire J.R. 5. Big White Guy
- I should probably watch NXT, people are telling me it’s good but I just don’t have the time-WAIT I JUST WATCHED 3 HOURS OF RAW #Bed